I want you to know that it’s ok to feel sad, or tired or frustrated sometimes. But please keep this letter somewhere handy so that you can read it when you do.
Before I was born, I was in a very dark, warm and quiet place where all I had to worry about was growing healthy and strong. I didn’t have to eat, or breathe or poop before, so coming into this world was a bit of a shock.
It’s going to take me a little while to get used to it all. We might just need to go with the flow.
Give me six weeks to grow and mature. To figure out what’s day and what’s night, to become more stable and predictable. I know you’re tired from my birth as well, so be patient and give yourself the time and rest you need to recover.
It must be hard for you to hear me cry, especially if it’s been a long night, but crying is how I communicate. It might be that I’m hungry, or tired or need a nappy change. If you listen and watch carefully you might start to read my little signs.
But sometimes I might just cry for no reason at all. Please don’t blame yourself, we’re both just learning to get by.
Please talk to me, sing to me, cuddle me and kiss me. I always felt so warm and secure in your belly. Please feed me when I’m hungry, this whole hunger thing is new. And forgive me when I vomit or wee on you – it’s gross, I know, but it’s out of my control.
I know this is a big change for you. Be kind to yourself and look after your relationships. Let your friends and family help. Give yourself time to rest, and take the time to do some things you love. It might feel like life will always be this way, but as I grow and mature we can start to do the things you used to do, with friends and family out in the big wide world.
Please remember that the little mistakes don’t matter, I’m more resilient than you think. If you think about it, all parents make loads of little mistakes, and most of us turn out just fine. I know you’re trying your best, and your love and care is what I need most.
Please don’t compare me to other babies, or be disappointed when I’m not perfect. Appreciate me for me and I promise you you’ll be rewarded and delighted as I grow.
I’m just adjusting to this new world, but I already know the best thing about it is you. I’ve known your voice for months already, but I’m starting to recognise your smell and your face.
We have so much to look forward to together – it won’t be long until my first smiles, then my first giggles. I’ll be rolling over and crawling before you know it.
The days will be long, but the years will be short. Make the most of me while I’m so small, and take the good things out of each day – even if it’s just a single cuddle.
Love from your baby